After Sage flipped out yesterday while looking out the window across the street and MAY have seen a cat between the trees, I am tired of the reactive dog thing today. I took Rei to the Field to meet Kevin, who stood me up since his labradors might get wet- even though I called and teased him about it, he was right, and the sky opened up as soon as I snapped the cell phone shut. Reilly and I cut it short because we don’t want to be all alone in a tall hayfield in a thundershower.
When we were about to leave the house for this excursion this morning, Sage got up and followed Rei and along- I said, You aren’t going to Tufts, there are rude dogs there, and you don’t like rude dogs. He looked at me imploringly. Insistently. But I don’t take him to Tufts Field anymore, no matter how he looks at me. I feel certain he hates the social scene there, although he likes running in the hay and sniffing for rabbits.
I put Reilly in the car and came back in for my phone- he was watching me out the door. I know I shouldn’t talk to him about it but I did. Seriously, Sage, you DON’T want to go. Here, I’ll make you a biscuit ball. and I wedged a milkbone in his toy and squeezed a little kong paste on it. I smiled and perked up, but he wasn’t buying it and continued to stare intensely at me, trying to jam some message through my head.
I asked him to sit, he did. I asked him to Woof, he did. I showed him the biscuit ball, and he sniffed it- Mom, that’s nice but really you aren’t getting what I am saying. The dog would not be bribed. I put the ball on the floor. He stayed in his sit and stared at me. Mom, LISTEN>
…!
…?
His lack of interest in food when he is on message makes some of our training against reactions much harder. Thank you, but Snacks are not important right now, Ma. This is what Suzanne meant about LISTEN to the dog, don’t just desensitize/counter condition. Sage is a very Real-World dog and can not be fooled twice. He is intense and authentic.
So What Would Suzanne Do? She’d observe that we have a block in our relationship, that all these tricks and gimmicks don’t matter to him. Cueing “looks Like” behaviors won’t do it. I can only respect him and work with him by being AS authentic in return. She always stresses CLEAR communication so the dog understands his choices, and waiting for him to choose.
I am sure I am unclear…and I don’t know what he is saying, either.
Take me, too? Don’t go, it’s going to Thunder? I sure don’t want to go but I don’t want you to leave? If you MUST go, then I MUST go with you? How frustrating for all.
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Here’s a nice Sarah Wilson/ Vicki Croke quote about the natural behaviors of different breeds of dogs: “Such things are simply “who they are”- like humans, don’t pick one because your plan is to completely remodel them into something else. Pick what you find easy to love and then love it.” Wisdom that can be applied to individual personalities too, besides breed traits.
my Teacher Dog is a tough one. I don’t think I would have picked a reactive weirdo broken dog, that I find that easy to love. But he IS a love and he IS fun and he IS mine, and I DO love him, so I need to always remember it’s just who he is. I’ve certainly tried everything to adjust him, and it doesn’t work the way they tell you it will for him. The same techniques work on Reilly, so the science of learning is not wrong, and I am not doing it (that) wrongly. Sage is just rather immutably who he is and the best way to be his companion is to accept his limitations, LISTEN, and quit bugging him about what he can’t do.
And when it stops raining- play more frisbee!
